Everyone feels down once in a while, but sometimes, for some of us, it can get a little out of hand, which is never good. So, when you're feeling down on yourself and find yourself calling yourself names, putting yourself down etc., How do you lift your confidence? What do you do so that you feel beautiful, like a good person, and competent?
After this morning's daily_lolita
post, where the poster used "retard" to describe herself, I thought I'd make this post here rather than raging.
It seems like Lolitas on LJ, like much of culture in general, have no problem with using ableist language (lame, retard, etc). What do you do, at a meetup/on LJ, if you encounter ableism?
Do you call it out, like I do, or do you just let it go? And if you do call it out, how do you respond to comments like "well I didn't MEAN it that way, stop taking it so seriously/it's only hurtful because you're letting it be/ dictionary defense/etc"? (I've noticed that posters in the Lolita comms tend to get VERY defensive)
Do you think there's a good way to handle displays of ableism among Lolitas, or do you think it's not worth trying to change someone's old habits? I know sometimes for me it feels like an uphill battle- I just cannot for the life of me understand why people still think it's perfectly acceptable to throw hurtful ableist terms around, especially in huge communities like egl
, with a wide variety of users from different backgrounds and experiences.
- Music:T.M.Revolution - PIN UP LADY
I finished our rules, we have a new layout, and I appointed new mods. So now we are official! I am so sorry it took so long, the comm was advertised before I could finish it! Now we are all set up and ready for anything.
Thank you for everyone for your patience and all of your interest. We had no clue we would jump to over 100 member over night! I hope to have some articles to post soon and can't wait to see what everyone has to share!
All of the rules were written with all of our suggestions in mind, thank you everyone for the input.
Thank you again and WELCOME!
EDIT: xD OK and NOW the layout is fixed!!! Yay me. ~
We strive for this community to be a place where everyone feels comfortable sharing their stories, challenges and triumphs, especially when it relates to our shared love of the lolita fashion. This community is for people who have a medically diagnosed disability/mental illness or other disease that is debilitating in some significant way, or who are at least currently seeking diagnosis. We are NOT here to diagnose you, nor give you medical advice. Also, we ask that aside from your intro posts we try to keep this community a place where we can discuss lolita fashion as it pertains to our disabilities. Of course, we encourage those who want to talk about other topics do so via private means. Please read our rules, and if you have any questions/suggestions, please let a moderator know.
Respect that everyone has an opinion and has the right to express it in an intelligent and kind manner. No flaming, no harassment, no drama. We will not tolerate any of it. It will result in a warning up to a ban.
2. LJ- CUTS
All posts longer than two or three paragraphs MUST be underneath a cut. Also any SENSITIVE material must be put underneath a cut. Also you may have one photo smaller than 300x 500 outside a cut, anything more or larger must be underneath the cut.
How do I use a lj-cut?
- Rich Text editor: Highlight the text you want to cut, then press the <lj-cut> button. In the dialog box, you can replace "Read more..." with another word or phrase to link to the entire entry.
-HTML editor: Type <lj-cut text="Read more"> before the text you want to hide, replacing "Read more" with the word or phrase to link to the entire entry. If you want to start showing text again, type </lj-cut> after the text you want to cut.
Please friends lock all posts to Loli_able. If you forget you will be reminded but if it is not changed we may have to delete your post. This protects you and other members.
4. TAG YOUR POST
Please tag all posts posted to Loli_Able. If it is a discussion post or a question tag with "discussion" or "question."
Tag all recipes, tutorials, discussions, article posts, and conditions.
Example: Blind, tutorial, Gluten-free, diabetic friendly, thyroid disease, Reye's Syndrome, article, ect.
5. NO MORE INTRO POSTS, INTRODUCE YOURSELF HERE!
No individual into posts from now on please, this post will serve as a condensed searchable page for all intros, This will be easier to locate other Lolitas with your condition!
6. ON SELF-DIAGNOSIS AND SELF-MEDICATION
PLEASE do not use any posts or information within loli_able to self diagnose or self medicate any condition. THESE PEOPLE ARE NOT DOCTORS, nor are we experts. Not everyone's condition is the same and each must be treated/addressed differently. Self-diagnosis and Self-medication is DANGEROUS. What works for someone else may be dangerous to you! If you feel you have a medical condition that is not yet diagnosed, PLEASE see a medical professional. No amount of internet research will be as helpful as help from a medical professional. If you do not have insurance or are not sure where to go PM kesson_shojo and she can give you advise on how to find free clinics or information on how to find a doctor in your area. There is always a way to see a professional!
7. ON DISCUSSION OF MEDICAL TREATMENT
Please only describe your personal treatment in general terms. It is alright to say you are currently taking medication, but please do not include specifics. You will be warned to remove that information or your post may be deleted. That is patent information that should remain confidential. Remember, just because someone else takes that and it works for them that it will work for you. Everyone's body is different and must be treated as such. If you have treatment specific questions about your individual treatments contact your medical professional. If you are truly unhappy with results or question their choice for you, seek a second opinion from a different medical professional. Nothing contained within Loli_Able should be taken as sound medical advise on your condition.
Due to many complaints and suggestion we have decided to make the intro posts easier to search and make it easier for lolitas of similar conditions to find each other. So NO MORE INTRO POSTS, THEY GO HERE NOW. We have decided to make a Master into post as a database!
To prevent a flood of intro posts and to have them in an easily search-able database this is our....
MASTER INTRO POST DATABASE
Please cut and paste and then fill out the form below in a comment.
Feel free to reply to any comment in this post to introduce yourselves to any lolita that is of similar condition. Like a friending meme!
If you have already posted an intro PLEASE fill out one here too!! So people will be able to find it easily here too. Your intro post will NOT be deleted (so if you want just fill out the form and add your link) but no more intro posts will be allowed.
<b>More about me</b>:
Well, where to start. I am Kuroneko and I am 22. I was diagnosed with Fibromyalgia in August of 2009, but had symptoms my whole life. I pain started around 2007, and gradually got worse and worse. I started seeing doctors for it in March of 2009. I have always been reluctant to see doctors, but my fiancé finally told me it was getting too bad and I had to find out what it was. I went through lots of medical tests, to no avail. In June 2009 I had to quit my job at JoAnn Fabrics due to the pain and fatigue being too much.
I felt a lot of relief in getting my diagnosis. Finally it wasn't a mysterious ailment that plagued my life. It was treatable, and that gave me hope. I am now on 150mg Lyrica twice a day, and it helps a little. I still have a lot of bad days, and the fatigue really gets to me most days. I have also started water therapy twice a week, and that seems to be helping.
I have also suffered with depression and anxiety issues since I was 13. I am on Prisiq and it is really helping. I have an easier time going out with out panicking due to it. I do get depression relapses quite a bit, but for the most part it's under control.
I wanted to also let you all know about my blog, Fibrolita. It's about my journey as a lolita with fibro and how they effect each other. I am hoping it will be a good read for anyone wit pain, be it chronic or from an injury.
First off hello and welcome.
Thank you everyone for your positive input. I am SO glad to see such a huge response so soon!
Of course, as some have seen we have already had our first troll. Aw, a milestone. We knew it would happen. Alas it has been taken care of and due to requests for now we will have moderated membership.
You will get a response normally within a few hours.
So thank you for that tiny laugh 4chan, It's cute.
Speaking of mods. I would like to introduce the current moderation team!kesson_shojo
If you need anything or have any questions feel free to PM any of us.I AM CURRENTLY ACCPETING APPLICATIONS AND NOMINATIONS FOR MODSHIP.
If you would like to apply email me
a brief description of yourself, why you would like to be a mod, why YOU would be a good mod, and what you would like to do to help the community. I will get back with you asap!
For now I am working on profile information, our layout, and some graphic design stuff for the comm.
Some things I am looking to introduce are discussion prompt posts, monthly themes, and hopefully to generate some helpful/insightful posts. Maybe a theme for specialty recipes for those of us that have to eat differently (diabetic, Gluten-free, ect), tutorials for different things, and whatever else you think would be helpful. We would like a healthy and active community, thats where you come in! TELL US WHAT YOU THINK!
I will update with the solid rules later along with my intro!
For now a small discussion prompt
to get things moving, because everyone likes a good banter.
This community is to help the disabled or "differently-abled" find others like them for support and a new insight on their situation, no matter what it may be! Sometimes it is nice to have someone to talk to that not only has similar interests but shares a common "difference" as well. What are you looking to find here and what would you like to see from the moderation team to help this?